This was me.
… 14 years ago.
I was obsessed with how I looked!
I was living in Los Angeles and my dream was to be an actress.
By day, I worked in Corporate America; by night I was studying acting and performing in theater!
I was in love, on the verge of marrying an incredible man who pampered and adored me.
We adventured the world on private planes, in 5-star locations.
I had the lifestyle.
The looks.
Financial freedom.
My health.
Community.
Passionate, loving partnership.
I had everything!!
There was just one problem …
I was silently suffering with deep inner-turmoil.
As you know, if you have read the Diamond Process™ book, eventually my emotional pain got too big to keep burying.
So, I left the life I had built in Los Angeles and moved to the redwood forest alone to face myself, especially what I (at the time) disliked about myself.
During that time, I cut off the wild mane I hid behind.
I gained 15 pounds.
… and one by one, I owned versions of myself that I dreaded becoming.
With shaky hands, I dropped my masks.
Pretty mask – poof!
Popular mask – poof!
Poised mask – poof!
POOF!
POOF!!
POOF!!!
The masks kept falling to my feet.
I felt exposed.
It hurt like hell, really.
I was seen as “crazy” and irrational to some.
I often doubted my choices, worrying incessantly about the future.
Spinning directionless, I had no idea how I was going to survive financially.
My 3 biggest fears were going homeless, going crazy and getting “ugly” (yes, getting ugly – that’s what an image-obsessed society can do to a young girl!).
Instead of anxiously trying to build myself up, I dropped to my knees and explored being all of those things (which I’ll save for my next book) and learned how to love the totality of myself.
The reason I am sharing this with you is because people often see my life today as ideal … and it’s true, I have a beautiful life!
I wake up each morning with purpose, calm and gratitude.
I have time freedom, financial freedom and location freedom.
I get to do deeply fulfilling work and travel with my gorgeous beloved Jason.
But, rarely do people see what it took to have the life I have today and, most importantly, to feel the peace I feel today.
The real question worth asking isn’t how did I create such a great life (that part is easy).
The real question is …
How did I triumph over the turmoil in my mind?
The short answer …
I learned how to turn pain into Purpose which is exactly what I am sharing with you today in this video.